Atypical Commute

On my walk to work today, a bird hit me in the head.

Fabio and I need to start a support group.

FBI’s Most Wanted

First they found bin Laden.

Now they found Whitey Bulger.

Waldo, you’re f-ed.

Thanks, Biggie.

“Hypnotize” by Notorious B.I.G., though a groundbreaking hip-hop song, will forever be burned into my brain as the song that made a 12-year-old me ask my mother what a ménage à trois was.

Big ups to Biggie for that special family moment.

Extra thanks to my middle school’s sex ed program for ill-preparing me for rap lyrics.

Cold Beer Hello!

Even the heavens knows when to highlight a good thing!

Thumbs down, Arnold.

I’ve always wanted to be a politician, but it sounds like way too much work to keep up with the required extramarital affairs.

Sheesh, I don’t have time for that.

It’s too much commitment to be uncommitted.


Bad Idea Jeans… Just Punch It…

Punch It, I’ll totally make it…  BAD IDEA

(Michael Tercha, Chicago Tribune / May 9, 2011)

Maybe this guy was wearing these…


Bad Idea Jeans

Comedy Birth Certificate

Hugs and Pullups is holding a press conference to prove that we were born in Chicago.

You know, for when we run for president.

Damn comedy birthers always breathing down our necks.


Dogs Doing Human Things

Do dogs have posters of humans doing dog things like peeing on a fire hydrant and find it as hilarious as we do when they play poker and smoke cigars?